Workout Fearin'

Think about why you workout as often or as little as you do. My top reasons for hitting the gym are:

1. Fear
2. Guilt
3. Self-love
4. Habit

Oh yes, I'm going to just throw that out there. One of the top reasons that motivates me to get to the gym on days when I just feel like watching some Grey's Anatomy and munching on air-popped popcorn is FEAR. In the last year I have aimed to rule my body with love, as Machiavelli would suggest, but most days fear and guilt win. Fear of the relaxed-eating-habits-5lbs, or the happy-and-in-love-10lbs, or the sneaky that-time-of-the-month-3lbs. With a lifetime dedicated to dieting and 5 years of serious hard work and self-educating, I am afraid to gain back that stubborn double digit number over 50 and regain that especially unhappy version of myself.

In an unscientific analysis from studying myself for twenty something years, I would suggest that I have a slightly obsessive (er, addictive) personality. A problem with food and self-esteem turned into an exercise addiction, to the point where I felt guilty if I didn't make it to the gym at least six days a week. I pushed my body into a rut for a number of reasons.

I was:

1. overtired
2. overworked & overworked-out
3. lacking sufficient caloric energy

 I should mention during this same point in my life I kept my caloric intake below 1200 calories, and on some days, below 1000. Now, I'm nearly 5'8" and there's absolutely no reason, no instance, no case where my calorie limit should be THAT low, especially when physically active. I stress this point for all you ladies that read diet and health magazines with glossy success stories. Rarely do they point out height in relation to weight and nutrition. There is a range of numbers when it comes to healthy weight, calorie intake, and exercise recommendations. For instance, a person my height has a recommended healthy weight of somewhere in the 120s all the way up to the 160s. That's a 40 pound margin! I bring up this point, because there is a large margin for what is considered healthy for each individual body.

I admit that I am in a phase of learning to trust my body. To listen. When does my body really need to go to sleep instead of a late night work out. And, when is my lazy, couch potato side trying to set my workout schedule. This week I have been particularly busy in the evening. In an average week, by Thursday I would have completed 4 workouts. This week I've only racked up 2. My old self would feel terrible about missing workouts. New self, positive self, knows the reasons why:

1. Those 2 workouts were tough, combining weights and cardio.
2. I'm still active - walking the long route to the train, using stairs, etc.
3. The days where I didn't make it to the gym had me up at 6 am and home after 9 pm, my body said SLEEP - and I listened.
4. I have made healthy nutritious meal and snack choices, listening to my body when it says no more.

So in this season of holiday cheer and special visits with friends and families, I encourage you to tune into your body and enjoy everyday. Prioritize fitness by giving yourself a weekly goal that is a range of a number (or minutes) of workouts. My goal for this week, considering my schedule and sleep habits, is 4 to 6 workouts. As long as I hit 4 workouts, I can keep fear at bay and feel satisfied that I am working towards a healthy and fit self.

PLEDGE TO RESPECT YOUR BODY BY LEAVING A COMMENT ABOUT YOUR WEEKLY GOALS!